July 27, 2016

Sometimes Things Move Backwards

Friends it has been far too long.

Those of you who read this blog could've been or might not have been wondering where the heck I've been.  Honestly, I'm simply one of those people who doesn't force themselves to do things they just don't want to do.  And for the last six months, I just haven't felt like writing.  Could have been for a number of reasons... adjusting to my new city, lack of inspiration, weight gain and feeling like a fraud, or just plain laziness.  Really, it's probably a mixture of all of the above.  But now I'm here to answer any questions that might be floating around out there.

How is Michigan?
Most of you who read this know me, and know that I LOVE my new city.  There have been plenty of "oh my word, I can't believe I get to live here" moments.  There is so much to do and see and it's fantastic.  It's been an adjustment, and not always an easy one.  Making new friends, learning more about myself, and starting a new job have all contributed to an overall sense of busyness.

What's new?
The biggest change in the last month has been a new job.  I'm now working as a receptionist for a large electrical engineering company.   I've been there a little over a month and it's been really great so far.  I like my co-workers, the office environment is beautiful, and I'm staying busy!  I've also taken up boxing, which isn't super new but it's new since I last wrote.  That's been a great experience. Swimming and running have taken a backseat, because again I'm just not someone who forces myself to do things they don't want to do.  I haven't quit, just on hiatus for now.

How's the weight loss going?
It's not.  The combination of losing momentum last summer in preparation to move and then getting here and adjusting.... I fell into a rut.  A bad one.  Old habits resurfaced, motivation went missing, and too many opportunities to cheat presented themselves.  I haven't gotten on a scale in months because I haven't been able to face those numbers.  But I know just from the way I feel and the way my clothes (don't) fit that it's NOT good.

So, now what?
I have a plan in place.  Whole30 started Monday as a means to reset, kill the sugar/carb cravings, and generally get back to feeling better.  Now that the craziest week at work thus far is over, boxing 3-4 times a week will pick back up again.  I'm going to plan on keeping myself accountable by journaling, getting back into blogging, and TALKING about things with people who understand and know me.  I won't be getting on a scale because I honestly believe that's not where my worth lies and that's not where happiness lies.  This time around it's not about numbers, because numbers drive me crazy and have also become a bit of a trigger for binges and bad choices.

I'm confident about where I'm headed.  I am happy, I love where I live, and I've been able start putting a lot of the past behind me.  I'm not going to obsess over the mistakes that have been made or be cruel to myself for allowing the weight to creep back on and I'm not going to dwell on the sense that I feel like a fraud because it all.  Sh*t happens and it's about how you handle it.  So I'm handling it.


  1. You are a strong beautiful woman and I love you!

    1. Thank you dearest. Miss you to pieces.

  2. I, for one, have missed your blog posts. You are a gifted writer. But I totally get it. We all have a fixed capacity and, often, something has to give. Be kind to yourself and know that you are loved. Always and forever.


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